I did wedding dress shopping wrong.
Which is funny, because my maid of honor, bridesmaids and mother did it exactly right. My MOH planned and scheduled an amazing day of appointments, complete with time for a nice long lunch (and beer!). My bridesmaids brought healthy snacks and all the encouragement without any of the opinions you see on "Say Yes to the Dress." My mother was a quiet light of love and support the whole day.
But I definitely did it wrong.
I started to worry in the days leading up to dress shopping when I wasn't feeling as excited as I thought I'd be to put on the dresses. Don't get me wrong; I was over the moon about a weekend in the 'Burgh with most of my girls. But I wasn't, like, giddy about trying on dresses.
So the day comes, we're having a blast, but when I was putting on dresses, none of them made me FEEL all the FEELS everyone tells you you're going to FEEL. I started to get a little frustrated/exhausted/worried and even cried at our last appointment because my head and my heart were just so tired. (Shout out to Glitter & Grit in Pittsburgh for sweetly allowing me to take a beat for some deep breaths and refreshing. Erin even suggested I put on the dress I tried on right after I cried one more time at the end to make sure the tears weren't blurring my dress vision.)
So we didn't get a dress. Because I liked everything and LOVED nothing.
We all decided it would be best to take some time, maybe go shopping again later with a little less pomp and circumstance.
Well, here we are three weeks later, and I haven't so much as LOOKED at other shops I'd like to go to. Why wasn't I jumping on this? Why wasn't I excited and determined to find THE DRESS?
And then it hit me.
I wasn't driven to find the dress for two reasons.
1. I'd already found it.
2. I just don't give as much of a shit about the dress as I thought I'd be. And THAT'S OKAY.
The more I thought about the dress I liked the most (we all affectionately refer to it as Air Dress), the clearer my reasons for liking it became.
I like Air Dress because it will be SO EASY to DANCE in!
I like it because it's sophisticated, a little funky AND whimsical--just like I like to think I am.
I like how our photos will look with Air Dress in them.
I like how effortless Air Dress is.
I like that I've already found it which means I can turn my time and energy toward our guests' experience. Which is what I've cared as much about as I thought I was supposed to care about the dress.
I am way more excited about seeing our family and friends enjoy rooftop cocktails and live jazz. I am so much more excited about the photo booth with our sidecar in it. I can't wait to see people's faces when they come in for hugs and congratulations.
I'm most excited about OUR wedding, not MY wedding dress.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a dress to order. ;)