boss

I Had To Write You A Letter Because Last Night You Weren't Listening // WV Boudoir. Photographer

Dear Mr. B,

It was nice to meet you last night, but there are some things you need to learn before we speak again. You behaved badly, and unfortunately for you, I am in the process of learning how to take up space. My taking up space leaves less room for you, and you seemed to take issue with that. My presence, unless it was silent, clearly made you uncomfortable. And instead of sitting quietly with that, you got louder. I am too amazing to allow you or anyone like you continue to react to me in this way.

I have a lot to say, Mr. B. Big things, important things. But my body is small. And my voice is high pitched. And if I raise my voice, I’m a bitch. If I raise my voice just to be heard, I’m pushy. I’m bossy. I can’t take a joke. I’m obnoxious. I’m “a lot.”

But you have no idea what you’re missing. I have thoughts. I have ideas. I have knowledge that would blow your goddamn mind. I have questions you’d love to be asked, and I have inspiring answers to the questions you’d never even think to ask me.

I’d love to tell you how you can improve your behavior, but you’re probably not listening. All I can say is the next time we meet, prepared to feel uncomfortable with my volume, my words, my existence. And this time, I won’t let you get away with it.

From Barista to Boss // West Virginia Boudoir Photographer

If you'd told me four years ago that I'd be lying in the plush ass bed of a swank ass hotel, blogging for my bad ass business after a fabulous dinner with my fabulous friend, I would have said, 

 "Well, yeah. Of course I will."

Because those were things I wanted. And things I was willing to work for.  

Tomorrow I'm going to wake up in a luxe hotel room to coffee that my fiancè brought upstairs for me from the Starbucks in the lobby. I'm going to drink that coffee while we laugh in our bathrobes and share what we'd like to get done. Then, we're going to take our laptops and sit in the lobby/gorgeous Starbucks and do our jobs. 

I'm able to enjoy all of this because I took one step at a time to change my life. It didn't happen overnight, and it isn't always this glamorous.

This won't be the first time Ricky and I have worked at Starbucks at the same time. But five years ago, when we met, I was on the other side of the counter serving him coffee while he did freelance work from my Starbucks. I was nearing the end of my time there, because I was becoming unhappy with the job. I wanted more. And I knew I was capable of it. So I fucking did it.

I'm telling you to dream bigger. No, bigger. What do you want? What do you want your life to look like? 

Here's some homework for you.

Write down 5 things about the life you want to have, but don't yet. Don't be cynical about this. Of course we'd all like a million dollars and two more days in the week. Dream realistically big. Different job? Different town? More exercise? Better food? More connection? 

Now the hard part. 

Write down 3 things you can DO for each of the 5 ways you'd like your life to be different. Small steps first. You want to make a career change? Polish up that CV. You want to eat better? Hop on Pinterest and make a meal plan and a grocery list.

Now...

Go do it.  

This is National Bosses Day, and you, my friend are the boss of your own life. Go get the life you want, tiger.