mountaineers

Home is Where the Hard Is // West Virginia Boudoir Photographer

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West Virginia has been my home for 31 years, and for about 14 years of that, I've assumed it wouldn't be for forever. 

Being the youngest and the only girl of three children gave me big dreams. Dreams that West Virginia couldn't facilitate, no matter how much I wanted it to be able to. As I grew older, the dreams changed, but the mountain state's ability to accommodate them didn't. 

First it was a healthy music scene that couldn't support my pop star dreams. Then it was speech writing I wanted to do, but not for any of West Virginia's politicians. After that, it was music again and then opening my own tea and stationery shop. Currently, it's my dream of running a wedding venue and growing my boudoir photography business that my mountain mama can't sustain.

Or can it?

Starting my own business has taught me a lot of lessons. Among them is that seemingly impossible things are actually probably really possible. When someone says something is unlikely or impossible, it's probably that they just don't want to do the hard work to make it possible. 

That might be the case for most things in West Virginia. 

The other night, on my third beer in a friend's bar, I looked at my world and mentally checked off things that I want for my/our life. Things I thought I couldn't get here. Things I thought I'd have to leave for.

A tight group of friends to grab drinks with periodically. Check.

A place to drink, a watering hole so to speak. Check.

A place to play music when the fancy strikes us. Check.

A charming neighborhood within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Check.

A way to open a wedding venue. Check. 

A way to keep doing boudoir. Check. 

Check, check, check, check, check, check. 

So many West Virginia natives grow up hearing what West Virginia DOESN'T have, and what you CAN'T do here, and why you SHOULDN'T stay here that we forget to look for ways to stay.

It wasn't until I was a few brews in and surrounded by my crew that I stopped and really saw what West Virginia DOES have, what we CAN do here and why we SHOULD stay.

For those of you following along, we're still moving to Pittsburgh, but we've always thought about it as a trial period. It's something we need to do for ourselves before we "settle down" as the grown ups say, but there's a really good chance we'll be back. 

Because we CAN have everything we want here. We can have it somewhere else, too, sure. But why wouldn't we come home? Because it's harder? That's just not a good enough reason for us. We've never been afraid of a little hard work. Maybe that's the West Virginia in us.

That Time Ricky Was Right and it Made Me Mad(ly in Love with Him) // WV Boudoir Photographer

8 months into wedding planning

Running a busy business

Progressing through a transition at work

Oh and life--family, exercise, friends, housekeeping, etc.  

Every Sunday, Ricky and I would take some time to compare schedules and for MONTHS we'd have something every. evening. and every. weekend. 

It was exhausting to say the least, and if I'm honest, we aren't out of the woods yet.

One of these Sundays, I was coming to the end of my mental and emotional reserves, and I exasperatedly said, "God. We are SO BUSY. Like, crazy busy."

To which Ricky replied, "Yeah, I'm done with saying we're busy."

Yeah, well, Mr. 9-5, must be nice to be so ABOVE being busy.

But once he explained his comment, my agitation turned into a deeper love for the man I get to marry.

He went on and said that we might not ever be not busy. This is just life for us. So let's just do it, take it one day at a time, and enjoy it. 

I fought my natural inclination to argue, as Ricky basically gave me a huge and heavy, "YOU'RE WRONG," which I don't take very well. Instead, I was quiet for a moment, looking at my man, and allowed what he said to soak in.

He was right. We are both ambitious, social people, and that means a busy life for us to be happy. We want busy. We thrive on busy. Busy means there's so much LIFE in our life together. That's how we like it, even when every evening and every weekend is booked.

Ever since Ricky slammed the brakes on our "We're so Busy" train, our packed schedules haven't gotten me down. We're just as busy as we were before his comment, but the shift in perspective completely rearranged my mindset on the matter.

Deep breaths of gratitude have replaced sighs of exhaustion. 

Note. Busy is not the same as nonstop. We take breaks. We steal moments away for cocktails just the two of us. We partake in our share of Netflix...and chilling. 

We're still learning not to balance, because I'm not sure I even know what that means, but to prioritize. Making sure we're putting first things first. I imagine we'll be learning how to do that the rest of our lives.

How do you deal with a busy schedule? How do you say yes to the right things and no to the wrong things? Do you enjoy being busy, or are you a slower life kind of pal? 

Xo

Jodi